And more backlog

12 February 2009
A was chasing something through a jungle/bush/land.


16/02/09
I helped Bill Murray steal millions of dollars - I drove getaway car. Then I was at my grandma's house laying low and I looked out the window and saw Bill out under the tree with a whole blanket full of money (like in greece etc where they have blankets of bags and sunglasses etc) so I went out and he thanked me for my hard work and said 'take your pick' so I thought about who I'd spend money on - buy house, take care of my family, bit to live on etc and chose a billion dollar note. Then I left and went back to grandmas. Later on I was in San Franciso/Auckland and went to bank the billion dollars but when I got to the bank it was written on a school newsletter. In typewriter font with a cut off strip it had Please deposit this money _$_____________ into the account of _____________. It was like a school banking slip. So I had to leave the bank and go find Bill Murray again. On the way I saw a young Cliff Richard busking. Then I caught up with the person who had the money but it wasn't Bill anymore - it was David Bowie!!! So I went to where he was and jumped in his car and said "Hey Dave, I don't think this money is going to work. It's a little suspicious I'm banking a billion dollars into my school account". And he said, "Sweet, here ya go" and gave me a million. I was stoked, but a little bummed it was only a million. Still, was looking forward to banking it so went back to the bank which was nearly closing and handed over my million dollar note with a real deposit slip. The banker looked at me in surprise but treated me like gold because I was rich. Then on my half of the deposit slip I noticed it had instructions from Iman (Bowie's wife) to him saying that he could only withdraw $50 a day, and as I was thinking I could just live on the interest which was going to be more than that I asked the banker to delete the instructions. And when she did that it pinged up all these security measures - all these questions came up on screen she had to answer and she was sweet until we came to the statement "this note has recently been stolen. Please contact security". And she told me this and questioned where I got the money from and I was panicking, imagining helicopters outside shining their lights through the windows at me, and just said I'd been working for David Bowie so it's sweet, it's just a mistake…

2 March 09
The smallest man in the world was dressed in hi-vis and crash hat, and climbing up lamp posts and diving off them into skip bins.

3 March 2009
It was night time and I knew J wanted to say something to me and was building up to it. I was about to leave to go out and behind me was just pitch black night time and stars (like we were hanging out in the sky. There were doorways and floors like a normal house, but no walls). And he said "Do you mind if I ask you something?" and I was a bit nervous and said "Depends on the question!" and you said "Do you think I should put my crafts into the Sanitarium Family Crafts Stall in the weekends?" I said yes, definitely, and that I didn't know he made 'crafts'.


4 March 2009
Had a dream I was at V Festival with A and B and we were in a dance tent with old people. And obviously that wasn't happening, so we left and P was there. And then we all got separated. Don't know where Awere was but then B and I, we got separated when he gave me only 3 mins to go to the loo and the queue was MASSIVE. B, walked off at the 3 minute mark. Then I was watching horse cross country, and couldn't get hold of them. Then I bumped into B later on and said "hi! Yeah, I'm having a feed and working on visas with an old friend from NZ". So I was bored and left and caught the bus back to London with all the old people.

5 March 2009
J (she) and I decided to hold a celebratory election charity party for Obama and his family. And because he's Obama, all the celebrities came. And it was the best party ever! Michelle was talking to Beyonce/Leona and I was walking around taking photos of J and I at our party where all the stars were being dropped off in limos. It was half my parents place, half function rooms. I snapped a pic of Michelle and Beyonce/Leona chatting after Beyonce/Leona had walked along the beach in her baseball cap. Then I went inside, checking on everyone making sure they were having fun, came across Hugh Grant looking like a homeless person in a lounge, and Julia Roberts having a great time, and then sat down with a family in Hester Blumenthal's restaurant - he was cooking for free for anyone who wandered in. I met my friend J in there. He was playing later on. Then I made sure a snotty posh woman was happy, and remember thinking deciding on tickets was tough - ranging from $50-150 and didn't want it to be expensive, but hey, if you're a movie star you can afford $100 for the kids right? So yeah, massive success of a party for the Obamas with all proceeds to charity, organised overnight. Then back at work I was telling everyone what we had done at the weekend and A goes "Yeah, I did that once and Justin Timberlake showed up". I scowled at him.

More

27 November 2008
It was after t's birthday party at my grandma's house, and after I had been on stage at BDO with the ting tings… we were waiting for some presentation to start and I dared A to eat a mashed chilli sandwich. And he did. It was like he just had a jam sandwich. And so the 5 mins of entertainment finished and it was back to boring waiting. And then I went to the beach with my school friends and a 'broken' drink. Apparently it's fancy schmancy bartender speak for when you have been travelling around all day with your drink in a cup in your backpack with no lid on, and then it gets bumped around so much it doesn't actually spill, but somehow it separates the alcohol from the mixer, and hence, looks 'broken'.

24 June 2008
Picked M up from bar with B - had tried to get hold of her on her mobile and got someone from Vodafone. M said "oh that's [a woman starting with G] -she will let you know where I am or what I'm doing if I don't answer the phone. She's a bit useless”. It was a human answering machine/PA. Then we went to the park and I had my Radiohead tickets and realised I had 2 and I couldn't remember who I got the other one for, or if they gave it to me by accident. I told the others I would give them the ticket for free for the best confession. While B and his mate were thinking about good confessions, T reminded me I'd promised one ticket to D when I bought them so I walked off to call D after telling the boys not to tell me their confessions yet. I ran into a jogger in town who had been talking about a bomb and I asked him to tell me - he pointed at a building and said it was in there. I went in to the abandoned building and upstairs I found a 44 gallon drum filled with explosives and petrol etc. I left because it was cordoned off by police long ago but thought the people who made it would come back and find me there and kill me. I told everyone in the park what had happened and B was going to write a story about it. And I was cursing him and his journalist mate because the man had told me in secret and I was the only one who knew so he would know it was me. M also sent a text because she had seen messy drunk people on the news and thought it was us in the park.

17 September 2008
T and I were on the side of the hill and I would just leap and float against the wind in a sort of flying squirrel suit. And I was thinking that if the wind stopped I'd fall to the bottom of the hill.

14 January 2009
T and I were on holiday somewhere with friends and I met up with P, who was flirting with me and signed a book to me from "Italiano" and that's when I thought he must be Italian. But his girlfriend was there, though he didn't seem to like her much. Then T was chasing some Asian girl all round the show so hardly saw him. Then I woke up and jumped into D's bed with him for a chat. Then later that night I told the boys I had to go and get some cigarettes because I knew T would be out scoring all night and I wouldn't sleep (sharing twin) so needed smokes in the meantime. And the pharmacy just closed when I got there. And then T came back to our room and seemed really distracted, but I didn't say anything to him about the girl, and he went for a shower. I followed him into the bathroom and talked to him over the shower curtain. I asked him if I'd done anything wrong and he said yes, actually. And I asked what and he was really angry with me but didn't say what, and I knew it was because he thought I'd scored D, but I told him to stop being so pathetic, we are just mates and there's no attraction, and anyway, what does he care if we did?

15 Mar 2007
MB went home to host a reality TV show and we at work were the subjects... M was the host and telling everyone the dirt on us all, and we were secretly being filmed working and interacting while he commentated. Like a Big Brother at Work. And then P was dressed up as big bird.

7 November 2007
T died and I was distraught like a lover/wife who'd lost their other half and then after a couple of days I could see him… he was a spirit though, still dead, but I was really happy I could see him and talk to him for a wee while and we sat outside in the grass and I was crying and told him my best friend was gone forever. And then he was gone and we had the funeral and random people were there like my old flatmate in NZ, his friends, my old workmates, and I just sat there with drained face and when people came into the church they saw me and cried.

29 October 2008
A, T and I were on some island and it was rocky like Croatia and hot. But I wasn't there 'with' them, just at the same time. And T and A went to the art gallery and were taking funny pictures of themselves, like T in front of Britney Spears boobs and you kept saying to me 'boobies boobies boobies' and then he took a photo of A and he had gone to the trouble of finding a paint palette and brush and stood in front of a famous painting pretending to paint it.
Then I was by the sea and it was ice cold and M asked if I wanted to swim in it with her, and I said yes, so we hopped in and I could see the bottom of the sea and there were fish that were camouflaged and I showed her and said watch this and poked one and it turned into a frog and swam off, and there were heaps. Then they were all frogs floating on the surface and they were all quite camouflaged apart from their big eyes sticking out. And then the sea was covered in them and I looked out further amongst the frog eyes and I saw bigger eyes and bigger shapes and the frogs then turned in to crocodiles further out.
And then it was evening and I was on a mission to find a man who was famous and rich, and wanted for bad stuff. So I went to a little village on a deserted part of the island and looked for him because I thought he'd be hiding out somewhere quiet and nowhere extravagant like his money would allow him to. On my way back into town I saw T and A sleeping in the dust below a tree on the side of the dirt road. They were both drunk.

Picnic table and L, J and J’s mum. She looked weird, sick weird. Went to J’s and her mum slept on wooden bed. Separated. Cancer in back of shins. J helping with cancer victims. Showed me photo of her A, A and P in Egypt upside down. C said someone's green and blue footprints were found in the house. I said they were both mine. Teacher trying to get me to play touch.

17 June 2008
I was at the beach and I met a guy who was real cool - we went swimming an hung out with his surfboard and car. Then he went away for a bit and I rode around on his horse, and thought I would defrag his computer for him. Then H and R got back and it was their computer and H was being REAL mean to me, saying that it was worth $15 million and I ruined the whole thing and to get out, and R was agreeing with him, and I said I was only trying to be nice, and then T came out of his room and went 'seeya!' and so I left, completely ostracised.

R was tramping in NZ and went walking through a rainforest and as she stepped on highlighter coloured lillypads they puffed out perfume.

27 June 2008
i had a dream we were getting ready for M’s wedding and the colours were awesome - i was wearing a baby yellow and sage green dress with gold makeup and i had a blonde crop. M’s dress was green and charcoal with baby yellow on it and it was satin like her ted baker dress, in that style. and i was trying to put my make up on so that i could help you get ready and no matter how much i put on, it looked like i wasn't wearing any. and we were waiting for A to turn up as she had arrived in the country but didn't know where she was. and then i came back from putting my make up on and M had already put hers on - she had charcoal RIIIIIGHT around her eyes down to her cheekbones, and eyeliner right around her eyes and on your eyebrows, and a green stip of colour following the line of her brow, under her brow... and i was all surprised and said 'wow! that's ummm... spacey!'







10/4/08
i was in LA going out to a flash Hills house party with these young good looking rich people and one girl was talking about earthquakes in LA while i was deciding what to wear. and this guy goes "yeah the Kiwis get lots of earthquakes too" and she was like 'no, we're the only ones!' and i said 'whatever! haven't you ever heard of the ring of fire??' and got a map out and found a line and said 'that's it. oh. no.... that's just a flight path. well, anyway, it's all in the plate tectonics.' and launched into this massive lecture all about plate tectonics and volcanoes and earthquakes and how they work and said if i felt an earthquake in London i'd probably have a heart attack because we're not on the fault line and the buildings are so old they'd all fall down.

16/6/08
a murderer was on the loose and everyone was hiding and locking their doors and i was peeking out the back window and saw men walking along the tracks which i thought can't be the murderer because he would be alone. then somehow, the murderer got into my house and he crouched down below the window in the kitchen and pulled me down too otherwise he would kill me if people found out he was there. he handed me a note he had written that said something like 'my name is taryn, and i stabbed this man' and then he stabbed himself in the stomach and bled out on my floor. and i was hysterical and called the police, but because he had handed me the note, it had a confession and my fingerprints on it so i thought they would think i killed him, but they knew it wasn't my writing and he was still holding the knife (dumb crim). Then a year later i met up with BC and we were chatting on some swings and i was saying i was glad we didn't all have to live in fear he was coming to get us anymore but i had mental problems because he killed himself in front of me

18 July 2008
T and i were getting married. Then came the wedding day and I was getting into my white heinous dress that was cheap and nasty and didn't fit right, and then it turned into me wearing my green dress and M and her brother (?) were helping me get ready and I spotted a mark on the front of it - looked like cigarette burn and A held the rest of my dress up to the light while i was wearing it and we could see holes in it. And then I had feelings for him - not proper ones, but i realised it was weird that I had feelings for someone other than T, but I ignored that as being normal wedding jitters. Then I was still wearing the green dress and doing my (blonde) hair and Twalked in and started talking about how we were going to go on a trip with someone and he didn't even notice I was all dressed up etc. And I said 'wait on! What are you doing!? You're not supposed to see the bride before the wedding!" and I freaked out and called the whole thing off because I thought all these things were signs we were not meant to be.

B and I were kissing. Then it was the next day and there was a ball and everyone was outside and in ball dresses etc. I saw him sitting in a little tent across the way with some girl and I said to my friend (who i've never seen before in real life) something about how I was bummed that he talked to this girl about his life when I'd known him for years but we'd never had a conversation one-on-one together in which he let me know how he felt about things. And then later on the girl he was talking to left and my friend went over and talked to him and I joined her to say hi to him. She told me to sit with B so I did and she left. B was reading one of his stories in the paper but it was not the norm - it was a book review he wrote. H was looking worried so I asked him what was wrong and he said his dad was sick. Then in my dream I woke up. And I texted B to ask what he had been dreaming about that night. He said his dad had been watching over him when B tried to kiss a girl but she got in first.

16 November 2006
J and I were sitting on a couch chilling out with head on my lap and talking and J had a really uncomfortable tummy and it looked enlarged and inflamed on the inside.

27 01 08
man came to the hut in the jungle i was staying in and he hung about for ages and i started getting scared. i thought he wanted to marry me so i hid inside for days pretending i wasn't there. when i finally went out he was still there and i asked what he was doing he said he was still waiting for some water because he was dying from dehydration so i got him water and he went away.

22 October 2007
i got up to go to work and went in to s and j’s room and said 'why haven't you left for barcelona??!!!' and they had slept in and weren’t going to make their flight and i was mad.
i went to work at lunch time but it was outside on the seaside and k was in a wee van thing and i was with T and he said 'dunno why you came in at lunchtime, why didn't you take the whole day off?' and i was like 'oh yeah!!' so instead of walking past k i sneaked around another way so i could go home and she never knew i was there.
Gave m and l little buddhas in wooden cases and i wanted one too but by the time i had given them the nice ones there were none left for me apart from broken ones.
d had some travel books for cambodia and thailand and they were like picture books but they were red pages and the tiny wee pictures were made of really fine glitter in the paper - they were sooooo amazing!!

19 July 2007
J and i were travelling in a car to see his mother. my sister was in the front and i was stoked because i had the next day off. we got to the house in the country and his family was there and mine. and he went out to chop wood. then j was wearing a maid's outfit doing the dusting and someone told me j got breast implants.

29 March 2007
i had been surfing with g and this girl from our childhood m, and i was going for a wee in a longdrop and m was sitting in by my feet and we were looking out across the farm land to the sea. and then steven tyler from aerosmith pulled up in his red convertible and went “waaaaaah! T, i’m taking you for a day out shopping!”

12 January 2007
J was running a music festival - it looked like nz but was sposed to be uk. i was walking around with him listening and then blabbering away. then j said to me: "You tend to think about things for a long time, and then you just blurt out words in a big hurry. Why don't you just BE, and/or DO, instead of thinking so much all the time?" I was so shocked at how he just said something simple that made things so clear.

26 June 2006
i had a dream last night bron stole some kids and hid them on a beach on an island. i found them and bought them home and she wanted to see me because she'd found out i'd foiled her plans and i knew i was in trouble but i didn't care

18 May 2006
Was at an event with j and he was behind the decks and i was looking for a shower and when i found them they turned into microwaves so i decided against hopping in. then got back to the room and there was a little publication like 'the package' with a note from j saying thanks to everyone but he was leaving working on the publication to 're-marry his work'. and i thought it was strange because i was expecting him to remarry an ex wife or something. so suggested maybe it might be nice to find someone he likes to put some energy into.

9 May 2006
I went home secretly and turned up at a bar and saw R, and we hugged for ages and it was all exciting to see him again, and then I looked around and saw M. He was DJing behind the decks, hair everywhere and white shirt on and I went over to tell him to come and play in London and he smiled at me and his teeth were all gappy and had diamonds in them. Then I turned back to R and said 'Lets go see C, can we? Can we?!' And he said yes but he had to let his girlfriend know as she was just standing there watching and not saying anything.